Meghan has found her calling. The boys school goes through high school. Every year the cheerleaders do a "Tiny Eagles" camp and let the K thru 4th grade girls help them cheer and do a half time routine. Meghan LOVED it. And I might add that she was pretty darn good at it too. I knew she would be with all the booty dances she came home from Chung Yi with. But she actually paid attention and knew all the cheers and all the moves. She loved preforming.That is why what we have been going through around here lately is so confusing. Meghan has been getting into A LOT of trouble at school. I really don't want to go into right now but she has been getting into so much trouble that I considered switching her over to the boys private Christian school. We had her assessed for Kindergarten readiness there. While she came off with flying colors in the intellect and academics portion the teacher said that her behavior was so bad that there was no way they would accept her. She would be too much for them. Therapy and medication were even mentioned.
So now I am taking her to the pediatrician on Wednesday to try to begin to figure this out. I have an appointment at the International Adoption Clinic in Charleston in October. I wish it was sooner. I am having her receptive language evaluated tomorrow. And then I am heading over to her school to fight for evaluations and services. They always tell me how brilliant she is (???) and blah blah blah. But maybe with these reports and the way she has been behaving lately I can finally get her into some therapy.
The problem is that this is all so new to me. Even though I have four boys, they have always been so healthy and easy. This is uncharted territory for me.
The chief complains are defiance, distraction, and lack of impulse control. Yes she has always displayed these characteristics but we have them under control at home. It's when she goes to school, or soccer practice or Sunday school and the teacher/coach doesn't know that you have to be strict with her that she takes over. I don't know if these behaviors are:
1) Testing the teachers at school because they have been pretty soft in the past, not too mention the main teacher has been out for 3 weeks due to surgery.
2) Orphanage learned behavior that she is regressing too
3) Just developmentally delayed behaviors - they are not so unusual for a 3 year old (but she's 6!)
4) Some sort of chemical imbalance that she has no control over
Maybe we don't see it at home so much because we are always on her to finish her tasks be it brushing her teeth or whatever. Tom filmed her last night brushing her teeth and gave her free rein and complete control. Without any parental redirection it took her 15 minutes to complete the task because she (all with tooth brush in mouth) performed several cheers, went to the bathroom, went into her room and got two books, which she read out loud (toothbrush still in mouth), went into the kitchen, found two baseball hats, tried on both, danced around and then finally finished brushing her teeth.
Is this normal for post institutional developmentally delayed children? Is this text book ADD/ADHD? Is this both? Is this something else? Is this just her acting out? What is going on?
Great to hear how brilliant she is, sorry about the behavior issues. Sounds like you're making a good start in having her evaluated. My sister recently had her son evaluated in depth and now my other nephew is having it done. I'll email you details. Meghan is looking so happy and beautiful in spite of the adjustments. BTW, have been reading - just life has been crazy, no time to comment.
ReplyDeleteI have been following your blog but I am not good at posting comments. Some of what you are describing so sounds like my 10 yr old bio son who has ADHD and ODD. He takes meds for the ADHD and it does help but unfortunately the ODD makes things so much harder. Especially when we brought his 2 yr old brother home. One of the issues with ADHD is they are emotionally behind their age group, he does much better with kids much younger. Keep on top of the school we had to write a letter to the principal to actually get a 504 plan implemented for our son, the counselor wanted to wait.
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you. I'm glad to hear she is doing so much better at home. We had very similar challenges with my youngest, and I remember feeling so discouraged and defeated after talking with some of her teachers in the past. Over a year ago, a friend from church told me about sensory processing disorder, which happens to be what my little one struggles with. I'm glad you are having her evaluated. In my daughter's case, the pediatricians weren't so helpful, but the adoption clinic sounds promising. I went to a nuerodevelopmentalist named Marilee Coots with Help With Learning. My youngest has improved soooo much, but it has been A LOT of hard work. A book called "The Out of Sync Child" really helped me to understand her as well. I have no idea what Meghan is struggling with, but perhaps these things could help her as well. You're a terrific mom! Hang in there!
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