We are coming up on a very special day for our family. The one year anniversary marking when we knew that Meghan was going to be our daughter. On May 4th, 2010 we found out that we had Pre Approval to adopt her. It still took 6 months to bring her home, but we knew on that day that she would be ours.
I remember the waiting and how painful it was. I remember praying desperately for God to end our waiting and bring her home. I remember claiming God's promises found throughout scripture that he would look after orphans and place the fatherless in homes. I remember clinging to hope and faith. Then finally, finally, she was ours.
Then I really needed God. I think the only thing that got me through those first days was knowing that God had hand picked her for us. That he had called us to parent her and love her and enfold her into our family. I survived only with the knowledge that God's plan is perfect and that since he had called us to her he would equip us for her. I had to let go of my selfish expectations and do what God had called me to do. Be a mother to her. So I tried and when I remembered to pray, God was there for me.
I think that God calls us to adopt not just to take care of these children. We all need refining. No matter how many Bible studies you do, Sunday school classes you teach, VBS's you run - there is always room for growth. Lot's of room. And it's more than just learning patience and relying on God's timing, although that seems like such a major part of it during the waiting stages.
What I have learned and try to put into practice - is that no matter how I worry that maybe there might be some issues with Meghan (maybe- maybe not), it doesn't matter. THIS is the child that God has called me to. THIS is the child that I will love and take care of no matter what. IF she ends up having special needs then that is because that is what God wanted for us. He will provide for us and equip us. All I need to worry about is serving God with all my heart, mind and strength. Like I always tell Meghan, I need to "worry about yourself." As long as I am doing my part I can rely on God to do his.
YEAH!! May 4th marks one year for us also! We both had pretty similar timelines. We heard about of first ruling the day you heard about your final. Our final came 10 days later. CRAZY it has been a year!
ReplyDeleteWell, I haven't had a lot of time on the computer lately and here I miss a bunch of your posts! It sounds as though you are continuing to make forward progress and learning to know Meghan and how she ticks more and more. I know it must be a struggle for you all to have your lives changed by a new little person, and it must be hard for the child too who didn't have a say in her life, future or family. You are doing a wonderful job of being patient and loving and teaching her step by step how to grow and learn. It must be quite a struggle for her to relearn her first many years. She really is such a pretty girl and i can see she will a joy of daughter to you!
ReplyDeleteAmen and amen! The only thing that has kept me sane at times with our older boys is exactly what you said...that we know without a doubt that God called us to be their parents. I know the same will be true for Sophia when she comes home. Hard to believe we are only a few weeks away from our year anniversary, too!
ReplyDelete